Lesbians: Are You Ready To Find — Or Deepen — The Love Of Your Life?

lesbian relationshipsIf you’re a single lesbian or queer woman who wants a truly fulfilling, happy, healthy intimate relationship… 

Or if you’re in a relationship already, and need some help with communication, trust-building and deepening your connection…

We’d love to assist you. 

We’re Ruth & Michelle, and we’ve created this site to help women love women. Better.

Wherever you are on your relationship journey, we’re here to help you make more love!

Love in which you feel seen, heard, accepted, appreciated and respected – and have the joy of seeing, hearing, accepting, appreciating and respecting your beloved partner, too.

Love full of ease, harmony, joy, connection and trust.

If you haven’t known how to find that kind of love — or how to grow it, nurture it and keep it alive and thriving — you’re not alone, and it’s  not your fault! And we understand.

Between the two of us, we have advanced degrees in Psychology, Neuroscience and Theology, we’ve taught at eight universities, and we’ve published 12 books…but no one ever taught us how to have this kind of love. 

We’ve been together for 9+ years and have a deeply intimate, joyful marriage now now — but it took us decades of painful relationships and breakups to get here!  Now that we’ve learned the secrets of fulfilling love, our mission is to make that journey easier for you. 

We offer coaching, live events in the SF Bay Area, free videos and teleclasses, and much more.

Single Women:

  • Have your past relationships started out great, but then ended up in disconnection, fights, confusion and pain?
  • Do you ever feel like you fall in love with the wrong women, and you’re not sure how to tell who’s right for you and who’s not?
  • Are you still hurting from a breakup – and maybe wondering whether deep, healthy, lasting love is even possible for you?

A 1-Hour Singles Roadmap To Love Consultation will help you understand what’s really blocking you from the relationship you want – and how to get unblocked! In just an hour, we’ll help you create a concrete plan for healing your heart, dating wisely, and preparing for lasting love.

Women in Relationships:

  • Do you find yourselves bickering, shutting down or getting locked in power struggles?
  • Does one of you frequently want more closeness, while the other wants more space?
  • Do you have the same fights over and over again, and feel stuck about how to resolve them?
  • Do you need help getting the trust, magic and connection back?

A 1-Hour Couples Love Breakthrough Consultation will help you understand what’s really going on, and give you a concrete plan for learning how to hear each other, reconnect, get your needs met, and deepen your love.  (It’s ideal when both women participate in the consultation – but even if only one of you is willing, big change can still happen.)

Just want to email us? That’s fine too. We’d love to hear from you, and we answer all our mail.

Scenes From Our Relationship, and More


We recently received an email with some wise snippets from our mentors, Gay and Katie Hendricks, who named these as the three secrets of long-lasting, loving relationships: 1. You can be completely yourself and completely close... the best kind of intimacy - deep, vulnerable, passionate - only ... Read More

How to Handle Rejection in Dating (And Why You Should)


What if you ask someone out - and she says no? What if you meet someone, feel a "click," and she says she'll get in touch - but she never does? What if you answer someone's online ad, and get excited because she sounds great - and then you never hear from her? What if you actually go on a few ... Read More

Online Dating: Pros, Cons, Pleasures & Pitfalls


Some of you know that we met online (via Craigslist, of all the unlikely online sites!)  So obviously, we're biased in favor of online dating. But, we know it also has many pitfalls. Here's an overview of why we think online dating is great: When you put up a profile, you get to say exactly who ... Read More

Are you two more like roommates than soulmates?


We've all seen it: lesbian relationships often start out so intense that we end up "merging" -- giving up our own interests, preferences and friends. At first that can feel great, but eventually one partner starts to feel smothered, and pulls away. Often, her partner chases her. Then that dynamic ... Read More

Don’t Text and…


This has probably happened to you. Your new girlfriend, or even your partner who you have been with for a while, texts you something fairly cryptic, and it triggers you, and then you fire right back, and then she gets triggered, and then before you know it, you're in a full fledged argument... on ... Read More


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